Your Pal vs. The Latter Day Saints

I was sitting one lazy afternoon a few years ago when I had a couple of Mormon missionaries came to the door. As is their reputation they were friendly and engaging, in immaculate white short sleeve dress shirts and black ties. They wanted to talk to me about the Church of Latter Day Saints. Now this has happened to everybody, I know, it's happened to me a few times as well. But this time was different.

For the past few months I had been dating a woman (lets call her Jane Doe for this story) who used to be a practicing Mormon and had even spent a year and a half doing missionary work in Canada, just like these two gents were doing now. But now,she was a Mormon no longer. She credits the church with guiding her through some very difficult times in her childhood and early adulthood, but she had some philosophical differences that she could no longer ignore.

We started dating right about the time of the 2002 Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City and the Post was running a couple stories about the Mormon religion that I would ask her about later.
"Did you wear 'the garment'?"
"Of course!"
So I learned quite a bit about the Latter Day Saints(none of the really secret stuff), but that didn't make me smart enough to say the right thing when the pair at my door asked if I know anything about their faith.
"I do, in fact, I'm dating an ex-missionary."
"Really?" one asked, his demeanor changing instantly to knitted brow consternation, all of his friendliness gone in a wink. "What's her name?" he asked.
"Jane"
"JANE, who?" getting twitchier by the syllable and circling his hand in the universal sign of "come on, more info!"
"Uh, Doe?"
This startled him slightly, "Of the Utah Does?"
I said, "No, the Florida ones."
No longer concerned about my soul, he had to lead this lost lamb back to the flock.
"So she no longer practices?"
"No, she drinks coffee and everything," I said with a knowing smirk.
And with that they were gone.
I had forgot to tell Jane about my encounter until some time after our break-up. She said, "Funny, I was wondering why I started getting mail from the church all of a sudden!"